Creative Gestation: The Benefits of Giving Work “Off Time”

Any writer knows how it feels to finish a brand new piece: The excitement is intense. This one, we tell ourselves, is the best we’ve ever written. Quick! Let’s submit it! Hold it right there, Shakespeare. Not so fast.

One of the biggest favors you can do for your work is allow it to rest. Put it out of sight and out of mind for a while, and then come back to it with fresh sight and a sense of objectivity. Let the bright gleam of novelty age into the patina of reason, and then assess this “masterpiece” you’ve created.

johnspenimageoriginunknownExperts have termed this practice of waiting “creative gestation,” and much like the shaping of a child in the womb, producing quality work requires a degree of time, no matter what genre. By coming back to your writing later on, you’ll find that certain word choices can be improved, images can be sharpened, and other enhancements can refine your work even further. Rather than sending an immature, embryotic creation to editors, you’re handing over “your baby,” fully developed, delivered, and ready.

Some poets like Philip Levine and Billy Collins have advocated putting a piece away for a year or more, while other artists and writers say a week or so is better than adequate. My own writing, I’ve found, undergoes a “gestation” of about two to three months – this allows many eyes to see it, and plenty of time to elapse between re-readings and revisions before I’m ready to submit. And of course, like that of all artists, my work is constantly in flux, even after acceptance and publication.

Even short breaks from the screen, page, or canvas can help, however. Getting up, stretching, walking short distances at a brisk pace, or grabbing a light snack and beverage can create cognitive distance from your work, allowing for new perspectives upon returning to it. Also, by allowing oxygen to circulate to the brain via the bloodstream, creators can ensure that their grey matter is functioning at optimum levels consistently, research indicates. Classroom educators have known this trick for a while, incorporating “brain breaks” into everyday cooperative learning structures so that students stay focused and alert. The same research applies to adults and artists: get off your backside and your brain won’t backslide.

Every writer has different practices and habits, and for some, creative gestation may take more or less time to be truly effective. No matter how many days or weeks it takes, however, one thing is for certain: Creative gestation allows for better decisions, improved insights, and real maturity of one’s work.

john03bJohn Davis Jr. is a Florida poet whose work has been published in literary venues internationally. His poems have recently appeared in Deep South magazineSaw Palm magazine, and Touch: The Journal of Healing, and he has forthcoming poetry in The Wayfarer. His book, Growing Moon, Growing Soil: Poems of my Native Land, is available through Amazon and other fine retailers. His website is: http://www.poetjohndavisjr.com/


This blog post is Copyright John Davis Jnr 2013. All rights are reserved Internationally. You may not reproduce it in any form, in part of whole, without the author’s prior written permission. That includes usage in forms such as print, audio and digital imaging including pdf, jpg, png etc. A fee may be requested for re-use.

Coping with a Cynical Critique, by Sandra Nikolai


Equator-1-Gallery-300x225Like any writer who wants to succeed, I spent years learning about the profession and refining my skills. I attended writers’ conferences, studied how-to books on writing and publishing, and read piles of novels in a variety of genres.

Armed with a draft of my first mystery novel, I took the next step in the process: I found a mentor through a writers’ group I’d joined. My mentor offered to review the first and last thirty pages of my novel and email her comments to me after a month’s time.

At the end of the session, her email arrived and I was eager to read it. As my eyes flew over the words, disbelief stifled enthusiasm. Her remarks were sarcastic and stung as much on screen as if she’d read them out loud in a room full of people. She proposed drastic changes to the characters, settings, and plot. She even advised me to re-write the entire story in the third person. (I’d written it in the first person.) In closing, she defended her position as a “tough editor” and hoped her comments would help me write a better book.

You’ve got to be kidding!

My next reaction was to send “Miss Sarcastic” a nasty email but I decided against it. It wasn’t worth the time or energy to respond to someone who was inconsiderate and rude. I’d just file a complaint against her on the evaluation form I had to complete and send it off to the writers’ group headquarters. And yet…

I read Miss Sarcastic’s comments again. Her mocking attitude had dealt a serious blow to my ego, but what if she was right and my story did need a revamp? After all, she had a handful of published mystery novels under her belt and had mentored other writers. I was…well…green. Surely she must know what she’s talking about. And so I conceded, knowing that the revisions to my manuscript would entail a major upheaval. In fact, the task proved a lot more difficult than writing the book in the first place and took months out of my life. After I’d finished, I put it aside. When I read it a week later, I was disheartened. It was no longer my story. The changes I’d made had sucked the life right out of it. I hated it.

Not one to accept defeat, I reviewed Miss Sarcastic’s comments again—this time from an unbiased perspective. I dug out my original manuscript and integrated the changes that I felt would benefit the story and ignored the rest. After I finished, I had to admit it was a stronger novel.

I recently heard that my mentor has abandoned her writing career. Her book sales weren’t doing well, so she accepted a job with a media firm. If anything, I owe her a modicum of gratitude. The experience inspired me to set up guidelines that I’ve since followed when reviewing critiques of my work. I’d like to share them with other writers in the hope they might find them useful too:

1. Take the time to review a critique. Let it ferment. You might interpret it differently later on.

2. Try not to take a negative critique as a personal insult but consider it with an open mind.

3. A negative critique gives you a choice: either fix the problem or ignore it. Consider how any change will affect your story. Will it strengthen or weaken it?

4. No one knows your characters or plot as well as you do. If a suggestion for a change doesn’t fit— no matter how good it might sound, don’t force it into the story.

5. Growing as a writer means heeding your inner voice or gut feelings. Trust your writer’s instincts more often. If you believe that a change will improve the story, do it. If not, move on.

Happy writing!

CWC-Member

Meet Sandra Nikolai

Bio-234x300Sandra was raised in Montreal, Québec, and graduated from McGill University. As a young girl, she loved reading the Nancy Drew mystery series and was determined to write her own stories one day. Her career choices didn’t exactly lead her along the “yellow brick road” to writing mystery novels—though working in a bank and experiencing a string of armed robberies did ingrain terrifying memories worthy of a story!

In 2002, Sandra won an Honorable Mention in Canadian Writer’s Journal short fiction competition. She has since published a dozen short stories online and in print. False Impressions is her first mystery novel in a series featuring ghostwriter Megan Scott and investigative reporter Michael Elliott. She is currently working on Fatal Whispers, book two in the series.

Sandra is a member of Crime Writers of Canada and Capital Crime Writers.

You can catch up with Sandra at her beautiful website and blog:


This blog post is Copyright Sandra Nikolai 2013. All rights are reserved Internationally. You may not reproduce it in any form, in part of whole, without the author’s prior written permission. That includes usage in forms such as print, audio and digital imaging including pdf, jpg, png etc. A fee may be requested for re-use if it is for a commercial venture.

A to Z Blog Challenge #18

Reblogged from My Rite of Passage:

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RELATIONSHIPS: the sweetest side of marketing

So says Cate Russell-Cole, an experienced creativity teacher and author. She has been published in many local and Internet e-zines, magazines and newspapers; and she has researched, written and taught her own courses since 1990. Her most successful course to date is Write Your Life Story, which has a thriving community on Facebook.

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While marketing has to sit near the top of my priorities, I often loathe it. It's a passionate love - hate relationship. However, it has a sweet side: the new friends, growth and serendipitous discoveries that promoting myself has tumbled me into. When Belinda invited me to write a guest post for her blog, My Rite of Passage, this is the topic I chose. So for those of you who are shy or battle with pushing your work forward, this post is especially for you.
P.S. This is the other thing that makes marketing and interacting worthwhile. I was in Twitter working on promotion for a guest post on memoir writing on Kathy Pooler's blog, when I saw this share of my post: bodice rippers funny promo This is indeed not what the guest post was about at all... not even close! Hilarious moments like these make the boring slog worthwhile. Thank you Bodice Rippers for your generous share.

You Don’t Have to be a Novelist: Exploring Other Forms of Writing, by Damian Trasler

photoWhen I was fourteen, I wanted to sit at a battered Olivetti, with my fedora perched on the back of my head, and rattle off gritty sci-fi novels of intergalactic adventure. Instead I would rattle off essays on the meaning of life, and novels based on the imagined future lives of my friends.

Lucky for me (and them,) all these things are either lost or filed into oblivion. Given the chance to stay home full time when my first daughter was born, I revived my writing ambition My daughter was unbelievably well-behaved, requiring very little hands-on care. We went for a walk every day, and she would sleep in her chair beside my desk, or sit on my lap when she got older. I sold my second short story to a magazine, and my very first non-fiction piece was picked up too. It was an unfair beginning, giving me a strange idea of how easy writing success could be.

From there I found it almost impossible to get into print again. I wrote and submitted dozens of short stories, shopping them around every feasible publication. I tried different genres, competitions, different forms… nothing worked. Luckily, I had picked up a job I could do from home, editing a magazine for R.A.F. families (since my wife was a serving officer at the time,) so I could still count myself a writer: I had to produce most of the content!

scan0002My break came when I was told to go out and meet people. I joined a Theatre Club and they were looking for a play to enter in a performance competition. They had heard I was a writer, and asked me to write a play for them. I had never written a play before, though I had spent some time in amateur dramatics in my youth. Since I was a writer having trouble getting a novel finished, I wrote a play about a writer having trouble getting a novel finished. We took the play on to the competition and won an award.

Shortly thereafter, an old friend asked if I could co-author a pantomime with him and a friend. He had found a new type of publisher who was willing to take on the script. This publisher existed only on the Internet, putting scripts up in a format that could be read onscreen, but not copied. Then customers could pay online and download the script immediately. I mentioned that I had an award winning play at home, plus a couple of other scripts I had written since then, and he agreed to host them too. Within fifteen minutes of my first script appearing on the site, it had sold to someone in America: the other side of the world!

From those beginnings, my writing partners and I have added many more scripts to our catalogue, and they sell well enough. More rewarding are the communications from groups all around the world, telling us of their successes, passing on press clippings and photographs of our plays and pantomimes. I have received emails from places I will never have the chance to visit, but they have performed my plays, recited my words and delighted audiences I can’t even imagine.

CoffeeTimeTales_2006I am a writer now. Despite the half-dozen odd jobs I’ve taken on since those early days, writing is what I do. I don’t make the money of a JK Rowling, or an E.L. James. Although I believe that quality is vital, that you should strive to produce the very best work you can, there are other factors that influence success. One is chance, which you can’t manipulate. You can’t ensure that your manuscript is picked up by the right person on the day they’re ready for a story like yours. But you CAN do things to increase that likelihood : You can polish your manuscript until it’s as near perfect as possible. Check the submission guidelines to avoid falling at the first fence. Look for an agent to give your submission more appeal. Be open to other forms of writing: you don’t HAVE to be a novelist, you know!

Sometimes life takes you in a different direction. I say it’s worth hanging on and enjoying the ride.

Follow Damian

Read Damian’s Work

TroubledSouls006Writing a play cover


This blog post is Copyright Damian Trasler 2013. All rights are reserved Internationally. You may not reproduce it in any form, in part of whole, without the author’s prior written permission. That includes usage in forms such as print, audio and digital imaging including pdf, jpg, png etc. A fee may be requested for re-use if it is for a commercial venture.

Make The Iron Hot By Striking: Writing Every Day

69cb8cac6f9199b4d8faaf1ce33c9479In the whirlwind of writing advice, one can always find opposing viewpoints.  There are many writers who counsel writing every day, and just as many who find such strictures confining and harmful to creativity. I am one who needs to write every day; even if what I write does nothing to advance the work, it keeps me limber and creative.

When I was young, I thought I had to have the perfect conditions in order to write; my desk had to be clear; my paper and pens just so; all the research done and documented; and a minimum of four hours blocked out. Once everything had fermented in my brain, I was ready. It took me eight months to get ready, but I wrote my master’s thesis in 72 hours.

Then my life changed.  My days of reading and studying for hours were over. I found gainful employment; I had children.  My desk was littered with crackers and crayons, my paper creased and grimy, and my precious fountain pens locked safely away.  The day job offered me respite from disorganization, but filled my day with meetings and paperwork. My writing stuttered, and stopped.  I convinced myself that I had writer’s block.

Pen on NotebookI found ways to work around my writer’s block, and in so doing realized that I did not have writer’s block but unreasonable expectations. Still I yearned for time, space, and order. It took me a while, but I realized that I did have time to write, tucked away in the corners of my day job, during the early morning hours when everyone but the dogs were asleep. I did not need hours of time to write a work in a single sitting, but could draft, improve, refine, and tweak, in small pieces of time and space.  I did not have to write in linear fashion, but could choose a part of the work that called to me; I could delve into a character’s thoughts and history in a way that might not add words to the page but added depth to the character; I could explore a personal injury in order to find the words to express a character’s pain, grief, loss, or fear; I could write to vent, complain, whine, protest, or endeavor to understand.

“Not only strike while the iron is hot, but make it hot by striking.”
Oliver Cromwell

I have known the adage of striking while the iron is hot all my life.  When I saw the above quotation two weeks ago, I was overwhelmed by how right the second part sounded to me. The platitudes of “practice makes perfect,” “if at first you don’t succeed, try, try again,” and numerous others are founded on the notion that one must strike in order to heat the iron. It may not pertain to blacksmithing, but it explains how I write with pinpoint precision. I have used the metaphor of a mosaic to explain the way I write, and knitting as the metaphor for how I tie everything together. My need to touch the work every day, to keep it fresh and alive is expressed in the need to strike the iron. Everything extraneous to the work burns to ash and flies away in the heat of the smithy.

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Each person must find what constitutes striking the iron, as it will be different for each writer. Each bit of advice must be weighed in terms of one’s own personality, personal situation, and proclivities. The only universal advice I can offer is to find what works for you, and make it a habit.  Also, realize that what works may change given differing circumstances, and make assessing how it is working a habit as well.  A new day job, a new relationship, even a new workspace, will have an impact.  Assess and adjust, then make it your own.

Elizabeth is a librarian by day, and a non-fiction and historical fiction writer by night. She has trained as a Medievalist. You can visit her web site, Facebook page and Twitter feed.


This blog post is Copyright Elizabeth Anne Mitchell 2013. All rights are reserved Internationally. You may not reproduce it in any form, in part of whole, without the author’s prior written permission. That includes usage in forms such as print, audio and digital imaging including pdf, jpg, png etc. A fee may be requested for re-use if it is for a commercial venture. The image is owned by the State Library of Australia. http://nla.gov.au/nla.pic-an24166489 (Fitzpatrick, Jim, 1916- Portrait of Ernest Edwards, blacksmith of Drouin, Victoria, 1944/1945)

Learning Curve: Editing and Publishing

The Writer’s Coffee Shop contacted me early last year and asked if I would be interested in writing a novel. They had seen some of my online stories, one of which had become surprisingly popular. Those online stories were the only writing I have ever done. I have no formal training, not even an online course, and so it was a matter of learning to be a writer as I went, making mistakes and trying to learn from them.

The editing process taught me the most. I had two different editors, and both of them had something different to teach me. Most of the time, authors are assigned one editor who continues working with them in their next books, but scheduling issues prevented me from having the same team on the second book.  It was such a great learning opportunity I told them I would be okay with it if they wanted to assign a new editor to me for the third.

Lissa-Bryan-Ghostwriter-Front-Cover-WebresI used to correspond with a published author. Her writing advice was the best I have ever been given: “Every scene, every sentence, every word, must drive the plot forward. If it doesn’t move the plot or reveal something important about the characters, cut it. If you can cut it without impacting your novel, it’s just dead weight, dragging your story down.” It is not easy to do. Even with that advice in mind, there were “dead weight” scenes in my manuscript I didn’t want to cut. I tried to make excuses for them, but in the end, I had to admit they served no real purpose, no matter how much I liked them. This one of the things a good editor does for you: gently, but firmly forces you to see where you’ve gone off-track.

One of the first things my editor did was send the manuscript back to me with all of the uses of the word “that” highlighted. “That” is one of the most over-used words in the English language. If the sentence makes sense without it, cut it. I was able to trim out an embarrassingly large number of them.

My second crime against literature was my passionate love for adverbs. Stephen King says the road to hell is paved with them, and he is right. They often tie into that old saying, Show, don’t tell, which was another struggle of mine. It is the difference between writing, “He paced angrily,” and “He paced with his hands clenched, his eyes narrowed and glittering.” The first tells us what he is feeling, the second shows us his emotional state through his body language.

It is part of learning to trust your reader. There’s an old story, likely apocryphal, Hemmingway bet a friend that he could write an entire story in just six words. He won the bet with this: “For sale: baby shoes, never worn.” With those six words, he gives the reader a full picture, because your mind supplies the necessary details: the crushed hopes of a bereaved family in a dire financial state. Sometimes, the most powerful words are those left unwritten.

theendofallthingsSome of these lessons I learned only in retrospect, but writing is a lifelong journey.  I can’t regret my mistakes, because they were valuable lessons. “We’re all apprentices in a craft where none is truly a master,” as the saying goes. I cannot wait to see what I will learn next.

Contact and Follow Lissa:
Blog: http://lissabryan.blogspot.com
Twitter: https://twitter.com/LissaBryan
Facebook: http://www.facebook.com/lissa.bryan
GoodReads: http://www.goodreads.com/author/show/5442345.Lissa_Bryan
Buy: http://ph.thewriterscoffeeshop.com/authors/detail/42

http://www.amazon.com/Lissa-Bryan/e/B009N6CFTQ

https://itunes.apple.com/us/book/ghostwriter/id560564245


This blog post is Copyright Lissa Bryan 2013. All rights are reserved Internationally. You may not reproduce it in any form, in part of whole, without the author’s prior written permission. That includes usage in forms such as print, audio and digital imaging including pdf, jpg, png etc. A fee may be requested for re-use if it is for a commercial venture.

Three Warning Signs When Bringing Your Own Emotions into Fiction Writing

Have you ever been working on a first draft and written down something where you had to stop and say, “Whoa! Where did that come from?”

I’m not talking about being so overly impressed with your own ability to write prose, I’m talking about moments where characters give voice to an emotion you didn’t realize you had. You’re going through a tough time financially or emotionally (or finacially AND emotionally), and out of nowhere you’re confronted with a scene where a character screams out, “I just want to be able to stop worrying about how I’m going to pay for the kids’ lunches next week!”

Suddenly, you’re staring your beleaguered emotional self in the eyes when you thought you were just taking a little time to escape into your story. How did that happen?!

Of course, we know that our emotions don’t just disappear when we turn to writing, even if we wish they would. In fact, it’s our own emotions that make our writing more powerful. Art is a living, moving thing. Without emotion, you’re just writing instruction manuals. They may serve a purpose, but they sure ain’t fun to read.

Beta-Testing Real Life

pj_in_oz from flickr I’ve recently become enamored with the works of Cory Doctorow. Mr. Doctorow is a big sci-fi fan and a techie at heart, so his sensibilities especially appeal to me. In a recent interview with Wired, Doctorow stated that he used his characters to sometimes “beta-test” ideas that he had for handling problems. If the solution seemed feasible in his fictional universe, then perhaps the idea could work in real life.

We face emotion in our writing every time we sit down at the computer, but we actually have the power to do something about the problems facing our characters. If we’re true to our stories and we take the process seriously, then we’ll have to come up with credible solutions.

I like to write big sci-fi adventures, but it would seem as if there isn’t much room to apply solutions to real life problems.

The same may be true for your writing. You may not be an Indiana Jones or a Lara Croft in your day-to-day living. You don’t live in Victorian England or the 24th century, so not all your proposed problems in your story will be relevant to your life.

But the emotions… Ah, yes, the emotions can apply. You can express your frustration, your sorrow, your joy, your child-like sense of enthusiasm. You can let those emotions flow on the page, and you can watch as they crash into the rocks of resistance. And then, you have to decide how to overcome that resistance. You can finally write the conversation you’ll have with the bully at your work or at your parent-teacher organization. You can write out honest responses to those who would doubt your dreams. You can share the depth of your sorrow with those who would just tell you to get over your hurts and ignore your past.

You can express yourself.

The Warning Signs

80415260_fba14a5e6cBefore baring your emotions to the world, you’ll want to keep in mind a few words of caution. Emotions can either derail or enrich your story, so make sure you’re getting the most out of them.

1. Keep your character’s motivation in mind when expressing emotion in your story. — Do your character’s emotions make sense, or are they just a reflection of what you’re feeling at the moment?

The problem with including personal emotion in story is that we can become too attached. We argue the emotions are “true,” so they have to stay there. Just remember, you’re writing a character. Your struggles still aren’t exactly the same, no matter how similar you are to your character.

Remember, the reader only knows about the world you present in your story. If you pull too much from your life, then you run the risk of leaving the reader without any sense of context in the life and world of the character.

2. Your emotional struggles may not be very entertaining. — Sure, your emotions are real, and you need to find a way to deal with them. Your readers may not be able to relate, or they might find the issue boring. I might struggle with coding a website for the day. I can try to convey that to my wife, but she just isn’t deeply interested. She cares about me, but the problems and, to some extent, the emotions connected don’t resonate.

Get an editor or proofreaders to help you figure out which emotions are the most important and the most resonant for your audience.

3. Watch out for the “everyone lives happily ever after.” — When we put our characters through a rigorous ordeal, rich with emotion and strife, we have to make sure that our characters earn the solution they find. As much as it would help in the storytelling process at times, tough problems rarely just “get better” all on their own. (That would make for some pretty boring stories. Right?)

We can’t make the solutions too simple for our characters after they’ve been pouring their hearts out through the course of the entire story. This may mean that your character gradually solves a problem. He or she may have to leave a situation or have a showdown with someone. Emotion means that things are building up, and there has to be some sort of release to allow emotions like peace and happiness to enter the picture.

Your Emotional Journey

Keep these warnings in mind, and your emotions can serve you in telling richer stories.
How has your experience been with tying in strong emotions to your writing? Do you feel like it got you off track? Have you ever been surprised by your emotions while writing? We’d love to hear from you in the comments below.


profile-michael-204x300Michael W. Roberts just finished the rough draft of his first novel and was surprised by how emotional he got over it. He works extensively in web media, and he blogs about writing, creativity, and communication on his site http://MichaelWRoberts.com

This blog post is Copyright Michael W Roberts 2013. All rights are reserved Internationally. You may not reproduce it in any form, in part of whole, without the author’s prior written permission. That includes usage in forms such as print, audio and digital imaging including pdf, jpg, png etc. A fee may be requested for re-use if it is for a commercial venture. The train sign photo is owned by pj_in_oz on Flickr and the electrocution sign by r000pert. Used under a Creative Commons Licence.

Getting to the Heart of Your Story: A Guest Post by Rossandra White

Jans-house-9-20-121At 49 I felt compelled to write a book. Not something I’d always wanted to do. I figured maybe it was just time to finally record all those stories about my ancestors who had been in South Africa since the 1800s, as well as my own stories about growing up in a small Zambian copper mining town; plus a two-year stint on a sisal plantation in Zimbabwe. This was before the two countries were independent, when colonial power held sway, when the bush was full of animals. And then there were all those road trips my family took to the Congo, Malawi, Kenya and Tanzania. The time an elephant chased our car for over five miles, forcing my dad to reverse down an excuse for a dirt road before the elephant gave up. The time we spent in the shadow of Mount Kilimanjaro with a crazy Belgian who kept wild animals for film-makers’ use; as well as that episode in Kenya when the Mau Maus attacked the cattle ranch where we were staying with a family my dad had befriended along the way. I had a lot to write about. What I didn’t know was that I intuitively chose writing “to take fuller possession of the reality of my life,” to paraphrase Ted Hughes.

maumaugang

Mau Mau

So I started writing, most days after work and on weekends. I agree with Kurt Vonnegut who said writing made him “feel like an armless and legless man with a crayon in his mouth.” Three years later I ended up with a 500 page memoir of flashbacks. The poor volunteer reviewer from the National Writer’s Association I joined penciled these little round faces with downturned mouths in the margins, complete with dialogue: “Oh nooo, not another flashback.” The other reviews I received convinced me just how much I had to learn about writing. Starting over, I bought and read a library of how-to books and took classes; I learnt about structure, plot, conflict, pacing, and theme. I joined critique groups and re-wrote.

This time I started with an incident when I was poisoned by rebels as a six-year old in Zimbabwe and turned my messy tome into a young adult novel and sequel, with two teenage protagonists, a black boy and a white girl. The story had political and spiritual overtones, lots of action, but the white girl and her family were essentially me and my family. The black protagonist represented Africa and her people.

An interested agent told me that the story was a good one, except that it lacked a unifying purpose; I hadn’t found the heart of the story. I didn’t know what that meant. I didn’t know how to pull it all together, how to find that elusive heart. I kept writing. Only now I began to realize that I hadn’t connected in any meaningful way to my characters. I had plumbed the depths of the story’s message and meaning, I had plot points and a climax; I had my people say words that revealed character and furthered the plot, but I didn’t know how they felt about all the conflicts they were going through, how they felt about each other – not in any meaningful way. That was because I had avoided my own feelings from the past. It was too painful. But in order to find the heart of my story I had to do so.

africaI immersed myself in the past and all those feelings I had suppressed. The white girl became more vulnerable, a little less reactive and rebellious; her mother more loving and sympathetic than my own distant mother had ever been; the father more fallible than I’d always believed my own father to be. Overall every character grew, including Africa, a country with which I’ve always had a love-hate relationship. In the end, what I managed to produce was a fully realized coming-of-age story. Both for the protagonists, but especially for me. Through the power of words, I had set down roots in time and explored my own personal myths, uncovered their purpose and grounded myself in a way I might not have been able to do otherwise.

You can follow Rossandra’s blog: “A former bushbaby’s take on writing, appreciating life and everything in between” at http://rossandrawhite.com

Rossandra lives in a Hobbit house, along with her two Staffordshire bull terriers, Fergie and Jake, where she writes about them, her life in Laguna Beach and her African past.


This blog post is Copyright Rossandra White 2013. All rights are reserved Internationally. You may not reproduce it in any form, in part of whole, without the author’s prior written permission. That includes usage in forms such as print, audio and digital imaging including pdf, jpg, png etc. A fee may be requested for re-use if it is for a commercial venture.

Confessions of a Memoir Writer by Kathy Pooler

HiRes quillFor the past three years, I have been writing my memoir. It’s actually been more like going to graduate school – learning the craft, practicing, toughening my skin for critique and rejection. Not all a walk in the park.

So why on earth do I do it? Because I have a story only I can tell, a burning desire to tell it and, quite frankly, I can’t help myself.

So I have a few confessions to make:

Confession #1: I spend more time exploring how I present other people than how I present myself.

I angst over ways to AVOID disparaging anyone else, even though the truth may indicate otherwise while still telling the story I need to tell.

A common perception of memoir writers is that we are “narcissistic”… me, me, me. But the truth is, I spend inordinate amounts of time writing, rewriting, analyzing and fretting over how my words will impact another.

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Yes, my memoir is about ME but it’s more about the mistakes I’ve made, the lessons I’ve learned over time and the time I lived in. It’s an invitation into my world that hopefully will help you connect with your own world. A story with a message.

Confession #2: When I’m not writing, I’m thinking about writing.

You might think I’m not working when I’m staring out the window but that’s when my creative juices are cranking up. That’s why you’ll see me scribbling on napkins in a restaurant or digging through my purse to retrieve a piece to paper to write down my thoughts. So when I take a walk in the garden, I’m actually “on the clock.”

Confession #3: I can’t help myself. I have to write every day.

If I don’t write every day, I’m up half the night with thoughts, ideas, words swirling in my head, it will not stop until I get up out of bed and put them in their rightful place on the page.

Confession #4: My left brain is as busy as my right brain.

I enjoy mixing it up with outlines, storyboards on one end or freewriting in a journal, and drawing a mandela while listening to soothing music on the other end.

I enjoy learning the rules and knowing what the standard of practice is, but I also enjoy breaking them in my own unique way.

Confession #5: KP_003 smallerI see stories everywhere. 

The most mundane circumstances can be rich with story. Just stand in line at a grocery store and observe the dynamics of the people. On a recent vacation to Missouri to visit friends, I ended up doing a blog post about my trip because, everywhere I looked, I saw a story that needed to be told. I was like a roving reporter, notebook in hand jotting down notes and taking pictures. I had a great time. Here’s my post.

Mea Culpa. I am writing a memoir. I can’t help myself. It’s just the way it is. My penance is I’ll just have to learn to live with myself until my memoir is completed and I start on the next one.
Memoir writers, can you relate?


Kathleen Pooler’s Bio:
Kathleen Pooler is a writer and a retired Family Nurse Practitioner who is working on a memoir about how the power of hope through her faith in God has helped her to transform, heal and transcend life’s obstacles and disappointments: divorce, single parenting, loving and letting go of an alcoholic son, cancer and heart failure to live a life of joy and contentment. She believes that hope matters and that we are all strengthened and enlightened when we share our stories.

She blogs weekly at her Memoir Writer’s Journey blog: http://krpooler.com and can be found on Twitter @kathypooler and on LinkedIn, Google+, Goodreads and Facebook: Kathleen Pooler

One of her stories “ The Stone on the Shore” is published in the anthology: “The Woman I’ve Become: 37 Women Share Their Journeys From Toxic Relationships to Self-Empowerment” by Pat LaPointe.


This blog post is Copyright Kathleen Pooler 2013. All rights are reserved Internationally. You may not reproduce it in any form, in part of whole, without the author’s prior written permission. That includes usage in forms such as print, audio and digital imaging including pdf, jpg, png etc. A fee may be requested for re-use if it is for a commercial venture.

The Healing Energy of Words: Writing for the Health of It

Earlier this year I discovered Diana M. Raab’s work on Twitter and asked her to write a post for this blog. I am delighted that she has been able to do it. This is an excellent post for anyone who is working through any battle in their life, whether it be emotional, spiritual or physical. You can follow Diana through Facebook, Red Room and She Writes. Her web site is here and her blog is www.dianaraab.wordpress.com.

“When life takes an unexpected turn, writing can be a beneficial form of release from stress due to either emotional or physical factors. Many published authors have used writing as a catalyst for their survival during difficult times. Some of them include: Mary Karr, Jeannette Walls, Anais Nin, Joan Didion, Tobias Wolff, D.H. Lawrence, Isabel Allende, Vivian Gornick, Kathr writers and Kathryn Harrison, Sue William Silverman, and May Sarton to name a few. For many writers, writing gives a purpose and meaning to their life.

D.H. Lawrence, for example, sat at his mother’s bedside while she was dying and wrote poems about her. He also began an early draft of Sons and Lovers, his novel which explored their complicated, loving, painful and close relationship. Marcel Proust wrote Remembrance of Things Past while sick in bed with asthma. Flannery O’Connor wrote some of her best stories while dying from lupus. I wrote my first book, Getting Pregnant and Staying Pregnant: A Guide to High-Risk Pregnancies back in 1983 while I was on bed rest with my eldest daughter. The book began as a journal I typed on my Smith Corona which was mounted upon a specially-designed bed table my husband built for me. After my daughter was born, I condensed the journal into a prologue and added research to create a self-help reference book for women having similar experiences. Now, more than twenty years later, the book is still in print and has helped many women cope with problem pregnancies.

In her book, Recovering, May Sarton chronicles her battles with depression and cancer. Anais Nin used her journals to write to her deranged father who left the family when she was young. In Nin’s case, her journal entries became a springboard for a four-volume collection of her journals. The memoirist, Mimi Schwartz is another writer who used her journals as a springboard. I’ve heard Mimi speak at a number of writing conferences and she shares her story of having written an essay for Lear’s Magazine about her experience with breast cancer. “Journal writing,” she says, “and the process of turning it into a public account—made all the difference for me in recovering quickly, emotionally and physically. It gave me a double set of survival goals: health and telling the story.”  As a matter of fact, her journal notes inspired her to go from being an English professor to being a narrative writer.

Writing provides an opportunity to vent both small and large issues, from  problems with your boss to the death of a parent. It takes a great deal of energy to be angry at someone; it’s much healthier to drop it, as one would a suitcase full of trash. Holding grudges is unhealthy and certainly quite heavy! Once we are able to let go, it’s easier to gravitate to the joys in life.

Journaling is a cathartic way to spill your feelings out on the page rather than on the person. My attitude is: “Direct the rage to the page.” I have a writing colleague who says, “If it hurts, write harder,” and for years those words were posted above my computer, until they simply became a part of me.

Some years ago, at an Associated Writing Conference, Dr. James Pennebaker, the author of Writing to Heal said, “Writing dissolves some of the barriers between you and others. If you write, it’s easier to communicate with others.” Pennebaker believes that there’s a certain type of writing that erupts when we’re faced with loss, death, abuse, depression and trauma. He does have one rule that he calls, “the flip out rule,” which proclaims that if you get too upset when writing, then simply stop.

Learning to open up about issues from your past and present lives does nott happen over night, but it’s all a part of the healing process. Author Louise DeSalvo, an advocate of writing for healing, began writing her own memoirs, Vertigo and Breathless as a result of coming to grips with her own pain.

Whether you’re affected by change, loss or pain, finding the time to write can be a boon to your healing process. Some people prefer to journal about their experience, while others may lean towards the fictional or poetic modalities to help them escape their own reality. Whatever your choice, once you try it, you’ll see that writing, in any form, can be healthy and empowering.”

Some reasons to journal

  • To discover yourself
  • To vent frustrations and express joys
  • To record and remember events
  • To fine one’s purpose
  • To plan for the future
  • To tap into your intuition
  • To become empowered
  • To build self-confidence
  • To allow self-expression
  • To uncover secrets, sometimes unknown to us
  • To improve communication skills
  • To improve mental health

Some journaling tips

  • Date entries
  • Don’t worry about grammar
  • Be honestly and write deeply
  • Write quickly
  • Don’t erase
  • Write for yourself

Some journaling prompts

  • Make a list of what brings a smile to your face
  • Make a list of all your accomplishments
  • Write about your morning
  • Visualize a place you love and write about it
  • What is your first memory?
  • Describe a grandparent
  • Write about books which have changed your life and why

The entire content of this post, including book covers, is Copyright Diana M. Raab 2012  The link may be shared, but the content may not be reproduced in any form in part or full, whether that be print, audio or digital, without her prior written consent. All rights reserved, world-wide. Action will be taken against offenders.

Diana Raab’s Biography

Since childhood, Diana has been fascinated with the written word. As an only child of working parents, she spent lots of time alone, which she filled with reading a great deal of books and filling the pages of many  journals. That’s how she liked to keep busy. She always expressed herself better on the page. Today, Diana is a poet, memoirist and essayist and teaches at the UCLA Extension Writers’ Program and the Santa Barbara Writers Conference. She frequently writes and lectures on the healing powers journaling and poetry.

Her award-winning poetry, essays and memoirs have appeared widely in journals and anthologies. She has two poetry collections, Dear Anais: My Life in Poems for You (Plain View Press, 2008, winner of the 2009 Next Generation Indie Award For Poetry, and My Muse Undresses Me (Pudding House, 2007) Her memoir, Regina’s Closet: Finding My Grandmother’s Secret Journal won the 2009 Mom’s Choice Award for Adult Nonfiction and the 2008 Indie Excellence Award for Memoir.

She is currently working on her third collection of poetry. She has two forthcoming nonfiction books forthcoming, Writers and Their Notebooks (University of South Carolina Press, 2010) and Your High Risk Pregnancy: A Practical and Supportive Guide (Hunter House Publishers, 2009). This book is a newly updated version of a book originally published in the mid 1980s.

The Transformative Power of Memoir, Guest Post by Kathy Pooler

I am a keen follower of Kathy’s work and was delighted when she agreed to write a guest post on memoir / autobiography for this blog. Kathy blogs weekly on her website, Memoir Writer’s Journey: http://krpooler.com and can be found on Twitter @kathypooler and on LinkedIn, Google+ and Facebook: Kathleen Pooler.

“And the day came when the risk to remain tight in the bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom.”  Anais Nin

We all have a book inside of us; a story that only we can tell. For those of us who wish to put our stories into words that will inspire and touch others, it can be a transformative process.

What is a memoir?

A memoir is a portion of one’s life told as a story with a focus on a specific theme, often referred to as a “slice-of life.”  My work-in-progress is about the power of hope through my faith.

Why write a memoir?

This is a very personal decision requiring self-exploration and honesty. Some people start out thinking they want to write a memoir but once they begin uncovering their truths decide it would be safer/easier/better to write their story as fiction.

That’s fine. There’s plenty of room for good stories, both fiction and nonfiction. Then, some people, like me, decide:

  • their life matters,
  • their story not only deserves to be told, it needs to be told, and
  • they are the only ones who can tell it.

Deciding to write a memoir was just something I felt in my bones. Again, a very personal decision.

What’s it like to write a memoir?

Photo Credit: Transformation by Inky Squid uploaded from Flickr by Kathy

Solitary. Painful. Awkward. Exhilarating. Fulfilling. Frustrating. Sweaty. Mind-boggling. Life-affirming. Grueling. Scary. Empowering, Healing, Transformational…

I figure I have an unwritten contract with my potential reader to give voice to my own life experiences in a way that will engage, entertain, inspire, educate and to help them connect with their own life experiences.

Here are my life lessons through my life experiences. Come with me and I’ll show you how I survived and grew. Maybe you can too.

How do I engage with my reader through memoir?

Sharing stories through memoir can lead to connections. Although writing is a very solitary activity, we can touch so many others through our stories. If the reader can see their own story through your story, their eyes can be opened to a new experience.

The question I ask myself is “Can I strike a universal theme in my own unique way?”

When the memoirist transports the reader into a story through dialogue, sensory details, and scenes and then reflects on the meaning of the event, the reader can be a part of the story.

Here’s an excerpt from Sacred Ground, a story about my nursing career:

The dimly-lit lamp cast a shadow of itself as I approach my silent patient who had curled up in a fetal position, facing the stark white wall. The sadness is palpable. This thirty-five year-old man is dying of colon cancer.

I hesitate at the door, pondering how a young man, five years older than I can be dying, his scared wife immersed in her own grief in the waiting room. What in the world can I say or do beyond my routine nursing duties? It’s easy take a blood pressure or administer a medication, but this young man is dying and I am his nurse.

As I slowly walk to his bedside, I hear his slow, rhythmic breathing. His dinner tray is untouched, the metal dish cover still in place over the plate.

“Mr. Jacobs, I’ll be your nurse this evening. My name is Kathy.” I lean in and gently touch his arm.

Slowly nodding, he opens his eyes and turns to me. Such sad, dark eyes. His thick black hair is plastered against his moist forehead and I see the yellow tone of his skin, a sign that the cancer has spread to his liver. He must have been a very handsome man in his healthy days, I think as I try to grasp the reality before me.

“Is there anything you need right now?” My own words echo a hollowness that underscores the deep sadness I am feeling.

How is a memoir transformational?

Photo Credit: Butterfly uploaded from Flickr by Kathy

I have found healing by facing painful realizations about my past regrets, missteps and foolhardy choices and this has lead to self-forgiveness.

Lisa Dale Norton (http://lisadalenorton.com/) in her book, Shimmering Images: A Handy Little Guide to Writing Memoir, (http://www.amazon.com/Shimmering-Images-Little-Writing-Memoir/dp/0312382928) says, “You must voice your own stories to get beyond them.” (p.15) h

When you have to shape your life story into a narrative arc with a beginning, middle and end, you the writer begin to make connections about the meaning of these events.

Writing a memoir has helped me to find my truths and to stand firmly in them. http://krpooler.com/2011/06/10/standing-in-my-truth-through-self-forgiveness/

By sharing my story in an engaging way, my reader and I become linked.

Memoir writing has a transformative potential when the reader sees her own story reflected in the experience of others. Both writer and reader are changed. http://www.thirdspace.ca/journal/article/viewArticle/hammerwold/138

I want to experience the transformative power of memoir writing. Where do I start?

You’ve probably heard the saying “Memoir writing is not for sissies.” It’s true. Memoir writing is hard work and requires every ounce of discipline, courage and persistence you can muster.

If you decide you have a story to tell and it will be in the form of a memoir then here’s my best advice:

Study the art and craft of writing memoir. Find a mentor.  Join a critique group. Journal. Take deep breaths. Exercise. Cry. Laugh. Reach out. Pray/Meditate.

Above all, believe deep in your core that you have a story to tell and only you can tell it.

Then write your heart out. Daily. On a schedule.

Be transformed and transform your readers.

My website, Memoir Writer’s Journey is dedicated to memoir writing. Stop by and join in the conversation and check out the Memoir Resources tab.

Have you experienced transformation in writing or reading a memoir? How has a memoir changed you?


Kathleen Pooler’s Bio:

Kathleen Pooler is a writer and a recently retired Family Nurse Practitioner who is working on a memoir about how the power of hope through her faith in God has helped her to transform, heal and transcend life’s obstacles and disappointments: divorce, single parenting, loving and letting go of an alcoholic son, cancer and heart failure to live a life of joy and contentment. She believes that hope matters and that we are all strengthened and enlightened when we share our stories.

This post is Copyright Kathy Pooler 2012. All rights reserved. You may not reproduce it in any form, in part of whole, without her prior permission.